A while back, I came across a very interesting short story that has to do with attracting women:
If you don’t feel like reading it (which you should cause 1. It’s a great story, and 2. You shouldn’t be a lazy bum who can’t read a damn short story in one sitting), here’s a tl;dr:
Guy works at a bathhouse, has a regular customer known as Bad Dima, who is a fucking G with beautiful women.
Bad Dima sits down with the guy one night and shares his knowledge of “homeopathic gene fire”: the art of stimulating your genes to convey strength (Also known as epigenetics).
“Your genes are not set in stone. The way that you live your life influences the expression and development of your genetic material. You may have fat genes, but they will never kick in if you spend your whole life running marathons. If you are a psycho, you will smell like a psycho. If you are a hero, you will smell like a hero.”
“So basically what you are saying is that if I want to pick up girls I need to start slaying dragons and kicking ass.”
“You could do that,” said Bad Dima. “Or you could cheat. Like me.”
Bad Dima hauled himself out of the Jacuzzi and dove into the freezing cold ice bath, hugging his knees and sinking slowly to the bottom. I winced. He came to the surface gasping and roaring, and then he climbed the ladder out of the bath and stood on the deck of the bath-house, dripping and grinning.
“Turn on the sauna,” he said.
According to Bad Dima, doing certain tricks will make a man’s genes smell better, and make him irresistible to women.
There is a lot of truth in this story, so let’s get into it.
Most of sexual attraction is unconscious and non-deliberate
If you follow me on Twitter, you’ve likely seen me talk shit about the concept of “game”. As a dating coach, I barely focus on that. I’m here to help you improve your chemistry and energy, not to tell you what to say and do, or what “game” to run.
Don’t get me wrong, “game” has its place in your interactions with women, but many guys overestimate its importance.
“Game” is only useful when chemical attraction is already present. By itself, deliberate words and behaviors do nothing to generate attraction.
So let’s say a guy runs his game on a girl. She melts for him, then has sex with him.
If that guy thinks his game got that girl wet for him, he’s wrong. HIS ENERGY AND ITS CHEMISTRY WITH HER ENERGY were what really turned her on. His game was simply the vehicle through which he gave his energy to her.
Another guy with similar proportions, clothing, and age to him could run the exact same game on that girl and she’d only respond with politeness.
Bad Dima gets this. He knows that your scent will get you way better results with women than any game you could possibly run.
When a girl isn’t chemically attracted to you, even the best game in the world won’t make her want to be with you. When a girl is chemically attracted to you, even mediocre game will work wonders with her.
Our brains have a limited capacity for processing information consciously. Therefore, most of our connection-making and understanding of the world happens subconsciously. This includes picking up on people’s smells, vibration, and overall energy.
When you’re meeting someone new, you’re likely not overwhelmed by their odor, but you do get a feeling about them. Part of this feeling is sensing their genes and the purposes they’ve evolved for. Weak people smell weak. Strong people smell strong. Athletes smell like athletes. Academics smell like academics. Etcetera.
OVERALL, YOU CAN’T FAKE YOURSELF. YOUR SCENT WILL ALWAYS GIVE AWAY THE TRUTH ABOUT YOU, YOU FUCKING BETA MALE PUSSY.
Buuuuut if your genes don’t smell great right now and they aren’t attracting any women to you, it doesn’t have to be that way forever.
As Bad Dima understands, you can do certain “tricks” that will, as he put it, make your genes smell better and attract more women to you.
Let’s deconstruct some of these tricks.
“Semen retention is bullshit. It’s all placebo.”
I’ve only ever heard guys who have sex regularly say that (which we’ll learn more about very soon). From guys who don’t have sex regularly but abstain from masturbation, I’ve heard almost nothing but positives:
* Increased energy and drive to succeed
* More motivation to approach women, better results with them
Also, Rollo Tomassi wrote a chapter in The Rational Male called “The Pheromonal Beta”, in which he deconstructs masturbation’s chemical effect on female-male attraction:
* Oxytocin released in orgasm buffers testosterone and dopamine
* Men who masturbate regularly have a sexually undesirable scent because of those hormonal changes
(NOTE: I’m not a fan of Rollo as a person, but The Rational Male is a worthy read and he speaks truth in his work. However, his work is only useful for understanding the female shadow. Women are more complicated than just their shadow)
Here’s the truth about ejaculation in two tweets:
Ejaculation through masturbation is only an energy drain. You spill out your sexual energy into a fucking tissue or paper towel, or if you’re a degenerate, in a sock or on the floor or in your couch (yes, there are guys out there who fuck their couches to get off. I even had a buddy in high school admit to doing it).
However, good sex with a woman is an energy exchange. She will take your energy, transform it with hers, and give it back to you. In this case, retaining your load is NOT optimal. DRAIN YOUR FUCKING BALLS IN (OR ON) HER, BRO.
By the way, emphasis on GOOD sex. Bad sex will give you bad energy, so be selective about which ladies you stick your dick into.
Always tip at least 20%, gents.
Say “thank you” and “you’re welcome”.
Treat people with kindness and understanding overall, without losing your backbone.
Now why does this make you smell better?
Like masturbation, generosity triggers neurotransmitters and hormonal changes in you. It raises your serotonin, which women smell on you.
I’ve argued that serotonin is more important than testosterone for attracting women.
Have you ever met a guy who’s in amazing shape but doesn’t get any girls? That used to be me!
At the time, I didn’t know what I know now. I masturbated regularly. I had little sense of masculine purpose. And I had few results in my dating life. But my past is a story for another day.
In fact, most of the GOOD results I’ve had with girls weren’t dependent on the shape I was in, but rather my sense of purpose. The muscles were only a bonus.
A sense of purpose in a man leads to higher serotonin levels.
Not drinking. But if you do, drinking straight tequila
I was in the best shape of my life when I was addicted to alcohol. My drinks of choice would ALWAYS be hard liquor (vodka, gin, whiskey, scotch) and some wine.
I didn’t drink beer, which was a good thing to avoid in hindsight because the hops in beer are pseudoestrogens.
In any case, excessive drinking will age you, lower your testosterone, make you gain fat, and potentially lead to more serious health issues.
Booze makes you strong. And my subjective broscience experience confirms that. Even hungover, I’ve had some kickass workouts.
My theory is that my body would compensate for alcohol-induced dips in testosterone, with post-alcohol SPIKES in testosterone. Hard liquor is an efficient way to get bang for your buck with drinking, and also avoid unnecessary ingredients in your drinks.
But is tequila magical? Will specifically drinking it give you a better smell? I honestly don’t know, but I’m trying it out.
Keep in mind, I DON’T recommend you deliberately get batshit drunk to enhance your masculine energy. The cons of that far outweigh the tiny gains in testosterone that excessive drinking ONLY MIGHT give you.
To get the benefits of hard liquor without the drawbacks, stick to a few drinks of straight hard liquor when you’re out at the bars with your buddies.
And don’t drink alone. Drinking alone is bad luck.
Violence is a virtue. A man who’s incapable of being violent isn’t virtuous. He’s IMPOTENT.
Women will rarely admit this straight-up to you, but men who can kill other men with their bare hands are sexy as FUCK.
And men who HAVE killed are sexy as FUCK. Have you ever heard stories of incarcerated killers getting fanmail from an abundance of women?
DISCLAIMER: Please don’t go murder anyone just to make women more attracted to you. I don’t recommend this at all.
You don’t need to kill any people or animals to put the scent of violence in your smoke.
Bad Dima goes to the zoo to stare down monkeys. I train in muai thai. In high school, I did contact sports year-round.
Simply roughhousing with other men will put a certain confidence in your demeanor and overall energy that only violence can trigger.
In high school, when I’d try roughhousing with buddies who DIDN’T play the sports I did, they’d cower, flinch away, or tell me “stop” like a fucking pussy.
As for the buddies who I DID smash bodies with (no, not in the sexual way), I’d get a little violent with them, and they’d get violent right the fuck back. THAT IS THE PROPER WAY TO DEAL WITH FRIENDLY VIOLENCE AS A MAN.
Now imagine how ladies would feel about guys like that.
“He can’t even take his friend getting a little rough with him. What if someone assaults us? He won’t protect me!”
And gone is her feeling of safety around you. And a feeling of safety is VERY IMPORTANT in female sexual attraction.
As men, we have a natural bloodlust. This doesn’t make us psychopaths. We’re just men. We’ve evolved to be violent so we can protect our tribes and conquer nature. A man who can’t be potently violent is not that much of a man.
We can gratify our bloodlust through first-person shooters and other video games, watching action movies, or watching sports, but those will not put the scent of violence in your smoke.
It’s like watching porn. Getting off to pixels won’t put a woman’s enhancement of your sexual energy in your smoke, however, taking a real woman to your penthouse then freaking it will put that sexual energy right in there (if it’s good sex).
So get some firsthand experience with controlled violence, gentlemen. Your demeanor and scent will thank you.
Having an attractive female friend you’re not interested in
I’m not a proponent of male/female friendships. Sex ALWAYS gets in the way. I have no reason to be friends with a girl unless I work with her or am fucking her.
Other guys are for friendship.
Girls are for sex and dating.
For those of you with social circles, having a close female friend who’s attractive and who you aren’t interested in can be an asset. She can be preselection material for you, or she can help you eliminate neediness by giving you experience interacting with an attractive girl without wanting to get with her.
You know how accurately women can smell a man’s neediness. That should be common sense.
Aaaand here’s one Bad Dima missed:
Drinking straight olive oil
Olive oil is a healthy fat. And guess what your body creates testosterone from.
Your body creates testosterone from FATS, that’s right.
Plenty of guys out there have deficiencies in testosterone because they simply aren’t eating a diet that’s giving their body and endocrine system the building blocks to function optimally.
Is that you?
Do you feel depressed, sluggish, and/or low on strength and energy?
DRINK REAL OLIVE OIL.
(I say REAL because there’s a lot of fake, diluted olive oil on the market. Avoid it.)
A couple days ago, I was feeling exactly that way. I was training kickboxing and I just wasn’t having it. My entire ride home, I was out of it, feeling weak, lost in thought. Then I got home, drank some olive oil, and perked right the fuck up.
The next day, I drank some olive oil right before my workout. I was a beast during it, set multiple rep PRs, and even had to add some sets I didn’t plan because I had so much strength left over, which isn’t typical of me these days. My energy was intense and every girl around me noticed me. This was no coincidence. Olive oil will work wonders for your T.
2-3 shots or tablespoons per day (with meals) is enough. Don’t go chugging it, cause that’ll be excessive.
Overall, all these tricks for making your genes smell better DO WORK in my subjective experience and in plenty of other guys’.
Feel free to let me know if I inspired you to try any of these, and what changes in yourself you’ve noticed because of them.
Anyhoo, smelling like you have better genes is a major aspect of attracting women, but it isn’t everything.
You do need game (to capitalize on opportunities with women, and to escalate attraction, not to generate it).
You do need to optimize your looks and other preselection factors.
You do need to have good energy.
You do need to understand logically how men and women truly operate.
You do need to eliminate neediness in all long-term aspects of your life, not just cover it up.
Catch you later,