I was going strong for most of the pandemic – Never missing a workout, building my business, and forging myself overall. I’m committed to being the best damn Ben Foth to ever be Ben Foth.
Then I started feeling like all the masculine energy got sucked out of me. I could move alright, I could work and write, but I felt like I lost a certain something. I was getting physically and mentally tired much more intensely and often.
I pushed through the fatigue as I do with any barrier to my success, but it wasn’t going away.
I mostly felt it in my workouts – I’ve recently struggled to do 30 pushups in a set, could barely do two pullups, and my legs have given out before even doing 30 squats.
Earlier during the pandemic, I could do 80+ pushups in a set, 20+ pullups in a set, and 100+ bodyweight squats in a set, and that was just MY WARMUP before moving on to incline and handstand and one-arm pushups, weighted pullups, and single-leg squats and lunges. I’ve gained a bit of muscle in the last few months just doing those.
But recently, my workout performance has sucked and my muscle gains have stagnated. I’d also lost the drive to work on my business. Maybe it’s a nutrient deficiency, I thought. Or maybe low testosterone. Or maybe I’m just not getting enough sleep, though I usually function very well even if I only get 4-5 hours.
So I got bloodwork done.
Everything came back fine except my testosterone.
That’s technically within the normal range, but at the very bottom of it. It’s over 150 points lower than the average testosterone of a man in his 50s! 20-100 points lower, and I’d have had clinically insufficient testosterone levels.
As a young guy in my 20s, I wasn’t going to accept that number.
I did some thinking, and determined that this sudden bout of low T was due to quarantine stress. There’s plenty of media-manufactured fear in the air about the fucking Wuhan virus, and even if I don’t buy the hysteria, I still feel it by proxy of my environment. I don’t have the gym and kickboxing to keep me sane. None of my friends who I’m on “yo, let’s randomly hang out” terms with live in my hometown.
So of course I’m stressed!
Stress is a silent killer of your testosterone. Cortisol, the stress hormone, inhibits testosterone production. This explains why I was crushing it and feeling absolutely solid in my manhood for most of 2020, but this recent stress has made me feel like a eunuch.
So I decided to take nature’s chill pill a couple times a day – Ashwagandha, which is amazing for cortisol reduction and consequently, boosting testosterone.
I’ve been taking ashwagandha for the last few days alongside my usual T-boosting regime, and I feel like myself again. I’m not tired or stressed in the slightest, I’m waking up with morning wood again, music sounds much better, my brain fog and physical sluggishness are gone, and I expect fast gains when the gyms open back up.
I also plan on getting my testosterone tested again in August to see if it’s gone up (which it almost certainly has).
I’m not just here to tell you about my workouts and endocrine system.
This is an email newsletter about dating, and I want to tell you about something I experienced while dealing with low T.
How testosterone affects your results with women
My most recent cold approach went like this:
I was out for a walk, a girl and I politely smiled at each other, I found her attractive, so I went up to her.
“I think you’re cute and I wanted to say hi,” I said. “I’m Ben, what’s your name?”
She told me her name and gave me some bullshit about social distancing.
“Corona’s not real,” I reflexively said, and we made some banter about that, then the banter died and she wasn’t giving me anything else to work with.
“You’re out for a- a walk,” I FORCED those words out.
“Yeah, it’s a gorgeous day out,” she said.
(I wish I was like “you know what the most gorgeous thing I’ve seen today is? You.”)
“I was just – sunbathing, and walking, you know,” again, I forced those words out. I felt like goshdarn Michael Cera here.
Despite the enormous amount of tension I’d created, she left me with a “nice meeting you”.
(The vibe I got from her words wasn’t “he was unattractive”, more like “I expected so much better from him”)
FUCK! WHAT THE HELL WAS WRONG WITH ME? I thought right after that. THAT WAS SO UNLIKE ME! WHY DIDN’T I HANDLE THE TENSION LIKE A MAN?
Every other cold approach I’ve done recently has gone smoothly on my end. I handled the tension like a man. I’ve expressed myself freely and naturally. So what went wrong that time?
Low testosterone is what. Your hormones affect your behavior more than you may think.
If you’re a gent who wants to get better with the ladies but you only address behavioral factors, you’re missing out on something equally important – biochemical factors.
I’ve talked about this in the post I just linked – Women are viscerally attracted to men with strong genes, and testosterone strengthens your genetic expression.
Women smell high testosterone in your pheromones. It’s not just your testosteronized looks they’re attracted to. High-T men’s SCENT arouses them, so you can’t fake being a hormonal alpha. To make a woman’s unconscious, primal side desire you, you have to ACTUALLY BE a genetically desirable man, then your pheromones will communicate that genetic strength.
If you get nothing but rejection from the ladies, even if you’re getting your positioning and psychology in order, low testosterone may be the underlying factor.
I’ve been low on T and high on T at various points in my life, and I know quite personally, the difference between being a low-T guy and a high-T guy is night and day.
And yes, I’ve smelled the difference on myself just like women do.
If you’re a low-testosterone guy…
* Unfamiliar guys treat you civilly but not in a “bro” way.
* Girls tolerate you, but you’re not a sexual being to them no matter how you position yourself. If your T is low enough, you may be the equivalent of an overgrown child to them.
* Life feels like an empty drag, like you’re misaligned with the world around you. You’re floating through it, but you don’t resonate with it. Escapism appeals to you.
* Your gains in the gym are slow and recovery after a workout takes a while.
* You kinda just go along with what people around you want; you don’t really influence them.
If you’re a high-testosterone guy…
* Unfamiliar guys automatically get all broish with you.
* Girls notice you when you’re walking down the street. They’re automatically receptive to you, and they’re open to being with you if your positioning is good.
* Life feels like a grand adventure. All you want to do is forge yourself and conquer the world. You can’t tolerate video games or TV for longer than half an hour.
* You gain muscle easily and you recover quickly after a workout.
* You have a natural self-directed attitude and people unconsciously defer to you.
There is no advantage to being a guy with sub-optimal testosterone. High-T men naturally get all the social approval, female attention, good looks, good vibes, and leadership opportunities.
I said everything else I want to say about testosterone in this post, except this last thing:
The two supplements I’ve seen the quickest results from are stinging nettle root and ashwagandha. Stinging nettle root increases your bioavailable testosterone, and we’ve already gone over what ashwagandha does.
(I’ll add these to the list of testosterone boosters next time I edit that post)
Your testosterone level is often the difference between being a sexual dud or a sexual stud to women. It affects literally every aspect of your being – your body, your brain, your motivations, your blood pressure, your skin texture, et freaking cetera.
A masculine mindset is useful, but without a masculinized body, you’re operating at a major disadvantage in the dating world.
You know how to masculinize your body – Get your testosterone up and everything you want will naturally follow.
As for the high-T mindset, let me be your teacher.